IMG (GUY) Revealed: Week #4 of the IMG Cleanse

I'm a little delayed this "week" in getting my update for the IMG Cleanse up, but... you know what?  It's okay.  It's enough, which goes right along with this week's focus.  Whoo hoo!  Before I get started with that, though, I'm going to go back and reflect upon the progress I made last week.

So, we gave ourselves permission to live obligation free...  One thing I noticed was the fact that I don't tend to "should" all over myself.  Nor did could I get my mind around "getting to" do something.  I did catch a few "have to's" in there, though.  But what I did notice is that I tended to change those to "need to's".  As if that is any better!

"I need to do this" and "I need to do that"...  It was never as dire as that, but it still denotes obligation AND "need"...  Well, to me that instills visions of one's life depending on it.

HOWEVER, I'm not going to beat myself up about it.  That is, after all, what my IMG wants, right?  No, we'll just mark this one up to progress made in awareness and go from here all the wiser and more vigilant.

One thing I did mention previously is that my IMG isn't as much of an Inner Mean Girl, as it is an Inner Mean GUY.  It was something that I woke up thinking about one morning recently, and it was then that I realized...  He's my dad!

I recall an argument that he and I got into when I was in my mid-teens.  The last line I recall getting out was "well, I must be a really bad person because nothing I do is good enough for you!"  Wow!  And it is not as though I had ever forgotten about that, BUT it has been just since I have been doing this cleanse that I've realized how much I truly took that to heart.  "Nothing I do is good enough..."  What a WEIGHT that puts on a person's shoulders because one's always striving TO do "good enough" and always falls short, mentally.

Now, I am most certainly NOT blaming my dad for my tendency as an adult to mentally beat up on myself.  I'm a believer that there is a lesson to learn from everything, and I'm way beyond trying to place blame on my past.  After all, I'M the one that is responsible for where I go from "here".  It does explain, though, why I see my Inner Mean Person as a guy.

So, on to this week's focus... Unrealistic Expectations...  OH!  This is a good one, especially in light of this past week's realization.  Don't you agree?

The two antidotes that we're focusing on are:

1) Under promise.  Over deliver.  This is going to be a rather difficult one.  There are times - though, not as often as previously - where I will promise the moon and deliver one of those little model solar systems.  Well, not really, but you know what I mean, right?  It goes back to being a recovering people pleaser, I think...

2)  Go for the C.  Give 80% instead of 100%.  I have never been much of an achievement junkie.  My grades from high school will attest to that fact.   I will definitely keep it in mind, but focus more on under promising and over delivering... *wink*

Until next time... Have a fabulous week everyone!

I am participating in the Inner Mean Girl 40-day Cleanse as a Self-Love Ambassador.
To thank me for my participation, I will receive a self-love gift from the founders of
 the Inner Mean Girl Reform School

The IMG Cleanse - Weekly Roundup #3

Things have been rather chaotic this week.  Such is generally the case, though, with the first week of school.  Especially given that my littlest (Little D) started Pre-K this year.  We're having to get in a bit of a flow where our schedules are concerned.  Toss a doctor's appointment or two into the mix, it makes for interesting times, indeed.

I'm still here, though, and I'm still workin' the Inner Mean Girl (IMG) Cleanse...

Last week was interesting for me.  I realized that I did tend to compare myself to others, but I didn't realize to what extent or even what form that comparison took.  For me... COMPETITION.

By nature, I'm a competitive person.  This is something that I've long been aware of, but until this week, I didn't realize that it can be a form of comparison.  Nor did I realize how vocal my IMG can be or what approaches she utilizes to spur me along.  "Oooh!  Watch out!  She's doing better than you.  You better step it up, or you're going to be left behind."

Awareness.  That's the first big step, right?  Only by being aware can I work with it...

This week, we're giving ourselves "Permission To Live Obligation Free".  This is a BIG one for me, and something that I've already begun to monitor.

I am one that will run through my mental to-do list, and quite often, I will say to myself that I "have to do this" and I "have to do that".  The more I think about it, it DOES weigh me down.  And as I'm learning from all the other Work, it's how we approach/view something that determines whether it's something positive or negative in our lives.

In addition to this, I'm a recovering people pleaser.  So, "naturally", there has always been quite a bit that I have added to my to-do list that is for no other reason than I'm trying to make someone happy so that I, in turn, can be happy myself.  Wow!  Does that add the feeling of obligation to something really quickly!

So, I'm turning my way of thinking around.  I don't "have to" do anything!  I do it because in many ways, it's my way of expressing love beyond merely mouthing words.  I make my kids' lunches every school night, not because it saves us money and is healthier for them, BUT because I LOVE THEM and want them to eat more healthy foods AND it leaves more money in the bank account for us to do more fun things as a family.  It's just a matter of changing my way of thinking as I'm doing these things...

In addition to this... I'm taking the attitude, if I don't LOVE it, in some way, shape or form, then it has no business being in my life.  Plain and simple.

Everything that exists within our realm of influence engages in an exchange of energy with us.  It is our decision how much energy we give and whether what we receive in return is worth it or not.

For instance... even a chair can engage in an exchange of energy with us.  We have to clean it.  That is a form of giving it our energy, but if we don't LIKE that chair, and we curse it for one reason or another... it is taking more of our energy.  If it is not bringing us pleasure in exchange...  Well, to my way of thinking, it's time to send it on its way and to someone else that may get the pleasure that we fail to get out of it.

This is a little diversion from the focus of the IMG Cleanse, but does support the idea behind simplifying (ie de-cluttering).  If you don't love it, send it on its way!

So, until next week's update/round-up, hang in there.  Reprogramming is never easy.  Believe me!  The IMG's had many years to become devious and deceptive.  Changes do not happen overnight.  Be gentle with yourself, and they will come.

If you haven't joined us for the IMG Cleanse, yet.  There's still time!  (You're never behind.)  Everything is right on the website.  The information, the videos, the interviews.  It's all there for a "go at your own pace" approach.  I'm certain you'll be glad you did.  I know I am!

I am participating in the Inner Mean Girl 40-day Cleanse as a Self-Love Ambassador.
To thank me for my participation, I will receive a self-love gift from the founders of
 the Inner Mean Girl Reform School

The IMG Cleanse - Weekly Roundup #2

Welcome back to the continuing of saga of Girl vs the IMG.  When last we left Dawna, she was becoming aware of all the instances that she tends to collude with others in gossip and spew forth toxic words...

So, how'd I do?  Well, I think I would have liked to have done better.  I became aware of all the times that toxicity, like sludge, bubbled from my mouth.  The good news is that I put a stop to it.  The "bad" news - though I hesitate to label it thusly - is that, more times than not, I froze or, in some instances, ran away... literally.  I didn't know what else to say instead.

At least I became aware...  It was a victory, in and of itself.

On to this week...  Becoming aware of and battling the Comparison Queen.  OH!  She is one of my arch-nemesis.  Both with her Mask of Inferiority, as well as Superiority.  Though, more often than not, she likes to take the approach of making me feel inferior because, in all honesty, it is where she finds the path of least resistance, I think.

Which areas does she prefer to strike?

My weight/body.  "Everyone is getting skinny, but you.  Aren't they looking good?  And you?  You're still fat.  No matter what you do, you'll remain that way."  Which, if our thoughts do indeed create our reality, I suspect is why I can exercise and eat right and lose nothing to show for it.

My writing.  "Did you read his/her words?  Weren't they great?  Too bad you can't write something of the sort.  And (where blogs are concerned) look at how many followers she/he has, and all those commenters.  What do you have to show for your efforts?  Oh... Look at that.  Nothing."


My house, my clothes, my abilities (you name it), etc.   Everything and anything that can be used to compare me to anyone else.

It was a discussion that I was having with my kids the other day.  My IMG?  I might have mentioned that I've run into "it" before.  Only, at the time, I pictured it to be a HIM.  An old, pompous man of high social standing, who looks down his nose at EVERYONE, especially me.

I may just have to hunt through my documents and find the conversation he and I had (as one-sided as it may have been) not to long ago.  He was really rather cruel in his tirade concerning my writing and creativity, but it is something that I've been working to get past, and whether my Inner Critic be male or female or a whole slew of personas matters not.  Through this 40-day Inner Cleanse, we'll be working together by the end of it.

Here Amy and Christine speak about comparison and ways that we can transform it into something positive.



Interested in joining us? It's still time! Hope you'll join us in this wonderful exercise in awareness as we move toward greater self love...

I am participating in the Inner Mean Girl 40-day Cleanse as a Self-Love Ambassador.
To thank me for my participation, I will receive a self-love gift from the founders of
 the Inner Mean Girl Reform School

A Respite Along the Path

As I have mentioned before, part of my journey toward simplicity is more on a mental/emotional/spiritual level.  It is requiring me to change the manner in which I think and approach life itself.  Some of this work is being done with the IMG Cleanse, BUT much of it was being done on my own prior to even hearing of the cleanse.  Some of the work I'm doing is being done by incorporating many of the concepts in the book Don't Sweat the Small Stuff ... and It's All Small Stuff by Richard Carlson, PhD and Your Sacred Self: Making the Decision To Be Free by Dr. Wayne Dyer.

Admittedly, I'm beginning to feel as though I've opened something akin to Pandora's Box in regard to all the inner work I am doing...  I'm almost reticent to mention it, but I have been finding myself doing quite a bit of running away the past few days.  Literally, running away.

This is not easy, this work that we do.  But, it does stand to reason, really.  Like a sedimentary rock, each year lived unawares, is like another layer of dirt and grim piled on.  So, it is no wonder, when we finally say, "enough is enough" and "I'm tired of feeling like this"...  Well, it is not easy to dig down through the accumulated muck and mud in search of that singular seed that, when it emerges as a seedling, is the True Self.  And just from the brief glimpses I catch of my own...  It is a reward in and of itself of a tough job done well.

In addition to this, I'm finding that once located and found, it's difficult to keep what could pass as a consistent handle upon it.  The day-to-day world is good at causing a type of temporary amnesia.  I am able to recall my Authentic Self, that I even have one, but throughout the course of a day with all the stress and outward influences I, more times than not, temporarily misplace her.

This is a place where the Universe (aka synchronicity) steps in and attempts to guide me along, I believe.  Because this is an idea that I've been pondering all day long.  How do I successfully connect with my Authentic Self on a higher level and remain in conscious contact while living a normal every day life as a mother, military spouse of a deployed soldier... HOW does one pull it off under "normal" circumstances??

So, it is quite interesting for me to note that an email arrived in my inbox with regard to an upcoming FREE teleseminar series called Beyond Awakening.  Nearly 30 speakers, all talking about (as I understand it) how to still grow spiritually while living the lives that many of us do today.  I'm still not certain when it starts, but, if you're interested, you might check it out...  Beyond Awakening: the Future of Spiritual Practice.

Like Dory (from Finding Nemo) said... just keep swimming, just keep swimming.  I'm just moving ever forward and flowing with the changes and the synchronicity coming my way.

Disclosure:  I have no associations with anyone affiliated with the Beyond Awakening teleseries.  However, I am participating in the Inner Mean Girl 40-day Cleanse as a Self-Love Ambassador. To thank me for my participation, I will receive a self-love gift from the founders of the Inner Mean Girl Reform School.

Week One - The IMG Cleanse Begins

A good deal is going on around here.  The change in the weather has brought with it a certain degree of busy-ness.  With all of the cleaning and weeding out, one might think that it was spring rather than early autumn.  Yet, the house is now being filled with all the yummy smells that herald autumn, though.  Yesterday, it was homemade soft pretzels and chocolate chip pies.

Yes, that was purposely pluralized.  BUT, in my defense, I did pass one of those pies on to our next door neighbors.  I'm a firm believer in sharing the "evil" that are baked goods. *wink*

As mentioned previously, though, autumn and winter are times when I tend to go within quite a bit.  This year will certainly be no exception.  Especially now that I've realized how big a part the inner work plays in my (and my family's) return to simplicity.

This week heralded the beginning of the 40 Day Inner Mean Girl (IMG) Cleanse, and as I mentioned before, my primary IMG is really something of a bully.  Verbal abuse is definitely her forte.

Not too long ago, I participated in an online creative workshop.  It was our goal to get in touch with our inner creative children.  I did do that, but in the process, I became more aware of the voice of my IMG.  I even gave her the opportunity to speak, and, let me tell you, it was none too pretty.

Since then, my inner creative child has gotten rather quiet.  She's there, of course, but not nearly as loud and vivacious as she had been during the workshop.  I suspect that it has something to do with my IMG, and that is partly why I'm taking part in the 40 Day Cleanse.

Admittedly, I wasn't able to take part in the Live Call or the Twitter Party for too long.  I became just a little overwhelmed.  But, I did listen to the recording last night and read the email yesterday.  Good stuff, I must say!  Gossip and toxic words...  Being impeccable with our word.









Now, admittedly, I've never really been one to start gossip, but I have - admittedly - been one to easily go along with it.  A colluder.  I have been guilty of that, yes.  But, as SARK said in her talk...  Awareness is important.  One of the BIGGEST first steps, I think.

So, it's for that reason that I've put this week's affirmation up on sticky notes around my house (my bathroom mirror, the downstairs bathroom mirror, and, even, on my laptop).

"Today I speak only from my heart.  I leave gossip and toxic words behind.  I truly speak from my heart."

In addition to gossip... what sticks out at me is "toxic words".

So, often - especially when I'm on autopilot, in a place of reaction - words, which can tear one down/apart slip out of my mouth.  My IMG likes to beat others up... not just me.  That is an area that I, personally, am working on as well.  Responding from the heart, rather than reacting with toxic words.

7 days to become aware of that which slips from my lips.  Love, not toxicity.

If you've found any of this to be of interest, and you haven't already joined us, there's still time!  Drop by and sign up today!  And I hope you'll tune in here next week for Week Two of the IMG, as well as an update on the progress I've made with this between now and then.

I am participating in the Inner Mean Girl 40-day Cleanse as a Self-Love Ambassador.
To thank me for my participation, I will receive a self-love gift from the founders of
 the Inner Mean Girl Reform School

The Inner Mean Girl Cleanse and My Journey

You know, I can't believe that I forgot to mention the Inner Mean Girl Cleanse in my last post!  It is, after all, part and parcel to this inner journey that I'm preparing to embark on and share here.

Beginning August 25th, I'm taking part in a 6 week (40 day) transformation of my Inner Mean Girl (known to some as the inner critic), and let me tell you... there is A LOT of work to be done with her because she REALLY isn't the nicest of girls at the moment.

If you're interested in joining me OR you would, also, like to become a Self Love Ambassador, there's still time!  I hope you'll join us because I really believe that the Self Love revolution that is being kick-started IS the first step toward world peace.  If we're all happy with ourselves... what's the point in going to war? ;-)  Dh and his comrades will be out of a job, of course, but hey!  It's a risk that I'm willing to take. lol

So... why DID I decide to join in the Inner Mean Girl Cleanse?  Well, as I mentioned before, I'm beginning a journey within...

Admittedly, I have recently found myself becoming really rather depressed.  So much so that I did go in to speak to my doc about getting on some meds.  We both agreed that it is a situational depression, given that it does tend to occur when Dh is deployed.  BUT, as I've begun to explore within, I've realized that it is so much more!

My Inner Mean Girl likes to whisper in my ear.  She likes to convince me that things aren't good enough around here and that I lack any real help; that my elder kids don't do anything, and that I have to do it ALL on my own.  How can ANYONE be happy when they have such a negative voice nattering in their ear??

And she doesn't stop there...  She likes to tell me that all the exercise that I'd been doing didn't do me a bit of good.  I'm still "FAT".

And my writing...  She likes to convince me that I have nothing to say that any one would be remotely interested in reading.  It didn't help at one point recently when the visits and comments to my blog seemingly dropped off and articles that I had written didn't seem to get placed.  It only seemed to reinforce what my Inner Mean Girl was saying, which added to the depression and my lack of desire to write anything.  She had helped me to lose sight of why I really do this, any of it!  For ME!  Because I ENJOY it!  And anyone getting anything out of it really is secondary to that...  I had forgotten that.

So, this journey that I have embarked on is not only an attempt to change her voice to a more positive one...  It is SO MUCH MORE than that for me.  My journey is to consciously get in touch with that part of me that spans the ages; that part is Divine and something of a superheroine.  The Inner Mean Girl Cleanse is part and parcel to that goal.

I hope you will continue to join me because it's sure to be an interesting journey!

I am participating in the Inner Mean Girl 40-day Cleanse as a Self-Love Ambassador.

To thank me for my participation, I will receive a self-love gift from the founders of

 the Inner Mean Girl Reform School